I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
