I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
