how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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