Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just cut my nipple shaving
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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