i just made my gag reflex go away.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
