i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
