Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
