Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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