she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
Randomize
