i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I could fuck to npr.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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