I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
