sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
