Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
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He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
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I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
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