There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
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