i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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