So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
