normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
