actually, I'm a sock model
her vagine was all disorganized.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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