I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
