I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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