Joe is yelling at the trees again.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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