Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
