i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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