She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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