I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize