I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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