I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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