can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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