How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
