we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
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