Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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