It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people are starting to question the shark bite story
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize