therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize