Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
