Have some text gold?

Comments

You must be Logged in to post a comment

  • "that guy." Sounds like you clearly don't know him. In that case, by lame you mean safe.

    Submitted by mel24 on Jul 18, 10 at 1:03am
  • Yeah not getting STD's is pretty lame.

    Submitted by brokenbyclouds on Jul 18, 10 at 1:59am
    • It's very rare to get STD's through oral sex.

      Submitted by GuildedTroll on Jul 18, 10 at 2:54am
      • it's a pretty damn good way to contract hiv

        Submitted by Darenator on Jul 18, 10 at 3:46am
        • haha owned

          Submitted by Hawk21 on Jul 18, 10 at 5:27am
          • per: Varghese B, et al. "Reducing the risk of sexual HIV transmission: quantifying the per-act risk for HIV on the basis of choice of partner, sex act, and condom use" (2002).\n\nThe per act chance of HIV transmission for receptive oral intercourse assuming an infected insertive partner is ~one in ten-thousand.\n\nwhich would mean one BJ per night with an HIV carrier for the next twenty-seven years.\n\nso, no, its a pretty ineffective way to contract HIV. \n\nhaha owned, dumba

            Submitted by JasonB on Jul 18, 10 at 10:35am
            • are you stupid. yah it might be a "pretty ineffective way to contract HIV" but it's still A WAY. gawd are you retarded this is a statistic it doesn't freaking mean you have to blow an HIV carrier ten thousand times to contract HIV it means a freaking ratio! you could get it the very first time so yah make him wear a condom if you don't know him because HIV meds cost a hell of alot more than latex

              Submitted by massgirl88 on Jul 18, 10 at 1:15pm
  • being lame > having an std

    Submitted by anonymous8889 on Jul 18, 10 at 2:13am
  • Why did you not taste the condom until you burped? Did you eat it?

    Submitted by Xander03 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:37am
  • firsty is a tool

    Submitted by anonymous8906 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:05am
    • no, you know what, and all you little "followers" who vote thumbs down just make me sad. do you have no other way to achieve a sense of belonging than to be fans of some random loser whose only accomplishment is spending too much time on TFLN and irritating dozens of people at once? the catchphrase might have been funny once or twice and now it's just a weird cult-like thing that is not humorous, and if you get your kicks out of pissing off people on the internet I highly suggest you get

      Submitted by anonymous8906 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:51am
  • Spoiler alert: Dumbledore dies.

    Submitted by Dumbledore_Died on Jul 18, 10 at 2:42am
  • You could have just given him head after he took the condom off, that damn latex flavour lingers.

    Submitted by BlackBirdFly on Jul 18, 10 at 4:34am
  • I know, like, protection is so lame. Cool people get STDs.

    Submitted by anonmyous on Jul 18, 10 at 10:46am
  • "Firstys" i hope u fart in the kitchen while cookin one day and ur balls catch fire

    Submitted by Young_Quake09 on Jul 18, 10 at 4:02am
  • @anon8609 you're the reason they do it, they want a reaction from you. To get them to stop just stop acknowledging them.

    Submitted by stig on Jul 18, 10 at 1:33am
    • I'm aware they're trying to get a reaction, what I don't understand is what kind of sad individual finds that entertaining...

      Submitted by anonymous8906 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:12pm
  • At least you admit that it's kinda lame

    Submitted by inflamessoilwork on Jul 18, 10 at 12:06am
  • Get educated britnone.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 19, 10 at 7:55am
  • This has to be fake. No one is sluttier when they're sober than when they're drunk. No one.

    Submitted by mo_chedda14 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:06am
  • Hmmm...what the fuck would Jesus do in this situation?

    Submitted by wtfwjd on Jul 18, 10 at 2:33am
  • Why would the person you’re asking know?

    Submitted by bluegirl25 on Jul 19, 10 at 12:39am
  • @simba7, that's not actually how you reproduce.

    Submitted by samanthasunshine on Jul 18, 10 at 8:23am
  • @stig... as in Top Gear? FUCK YES!!!

    Submitted by cbtango on Jul 19, 10 at 12:43pm
  • You're not a whore at all.

    Submitted by FckFirsty on Jul 18, 10 at 4:54am
  • Help, I'm allergic to latex. Quick hand me a pretzel firstyfollower.

    Submitted by KesJaye on Jul 18, 10 at 10:24am
  • Suck my dick:)

    Submitted by spiderman22cr on Jul 18, 10 at 6:37am
  • 281 represent!!!

    Submitted by Me777 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:22am
  • What you said about burning balls off from farting is completely irrelevant.

    Submitted by shackel13 on Jul 18, 10 at 5:54am
  • Rutty cockapoopoo

    Submitted by a_cum_dumpster on Jul 18, 10 at 12:45am
  • Condom for a bj? Unless she has a past/ cold sores i saw no

    Submitted by nmstew on Jul 18, 10 at 1:58am
  • You guys are dorks.

    Submitted by dinopete on Jul 18, 10 at 2:24am
  • What's up Houston! Htowns finestt

    Submitted by bwill10 on Jul 19, 10 at 1:51am
  • Tired of firsty-type drainers? Use diversionary tactics. I prefer the race-war variety

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 10 at 2:48pm
  • Omg for a bj... That's sad

    Submitted by cumallover on Jul 19, 10 at 6:23am
  • What a bitch. Just give a handy then. Giving head through a condom.... Defeats the whole fucking purpose. Bitches nowadays

    Submitted by BrosambaBinLaden on Feb 3, 12 at 3:35am
  • What u taste is a dental dam- must have been a hell of a nite slut!!!

    Submitted by mintyshake on Jul 18, 10 at 9:53am
  • no, you're really fucking lame.

    Submitted by Chef420 on Apr 27, 12 at 4:57am
  • They give it up freely. No force needed. Lame

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 18, 10 at 11:02pm
  • Omg... You are too cute with that one...fuckin wow! I'll never get those 3 seconds bakkk

    Submitted by jayybear on Jul 18, 10 at 5:28am
  • These haters are making me firsty! :)

    Submitted by FirstyNation on Jul 18, 10 at 8:45am
  • God-damned porch-monkeys.

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 10 at 2:48pm
  • Anon8609 pure conjecture on your part, do not assume you know anything about anyone that posts or remarks on this site, \njust like in the pretzel bible .. Ok that one was just for fun ; )

    Submitted by jenny8675309 on Jul 18, 10 at 1:10am
  • SWEET SAFE SEX IS THE BEST SEX, BUT NO CONDOM FOR BJS

    Submitted by dbzguy on May 29, 11 at 10:58pm
  • How do u stop 5 black guys raping a white girl? Throw em a basketball! Ba-dum, kshh

    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 18, 10 at 2:50pm
  • Way to keep Houston cool...

    Submitted by HaasMcCooter on Jul 18, 10 at 12:24pm
  • No he was wearing a condom foolishly to protect himself from your herpes face. You managed to suck that rubber right off him. Poor guy, if only he knew condoms won't save him from herpes or warts.

    Submitted by Fear_Cartaidh on Jul 18, 10 at 11:27am
  • Was that a bible reference?

    Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 18, 10 at 1:22am
  • Wow anon, calm down! it's ok! I don't really think firsty is a cult, he is his own person not making anyone join a group!! Lol Annnd you do know by you saying that you gave firsty exactly what he wants. I mean go for it, I find it funny how people get so pissed, but if it bothers you that much... I'm just saying.

    Submitted by pretzellls on Jul 18, 10 at 1:43am
    • He’s not really unique or anything. He’s mimicking KeithStone who was quoting Seinfield.. soo you’re all just a series of assholes that keep giving shitty texts extra comments with nothing to say.\n\nOn that note, why would she taste condom when she burped unless she swallowed it?

      Submitted by bluegirl25 on Jul 19, 10 at 12:44am
  • These pretzels are making me firsty!!\nFirsty why did you drink late-orade?

    Submitted by Me777 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:20am
  • is either that, or u like condoms for breakfast...

    Submitted by FakeM5 on Jul 20, 10 at 11:16am
  • Wtfwjd.... Love it.. Just in time to return to the \n" just like the bible " posts... So easy to make people scream w that one....

    Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 18, 10 at 3:04am
  • Omg dunno wots worse this shitty fake txt or the crap responses about firsty! Get laid losers

    Submitted by britney09 on Jul 19, 10 at 3:52am
  • Oh that wasn't a BJ u went all the way and that condom it broke

    Submitted by egroff54 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:22am
  • Firsty I sense a 360 no scope coming your way

    Submitted by i360noscopfirsty on Jul 18, 10 at 2:40am
  • Anon8609 calm the fuck doooooown.

    Submitted by dannnyy on Jul 18, 10 at 1:55am
  • Thank god you used a condom to suck his cock...cuz from the sound of it we would not like you to reproduce in this world...

    Submitted by simba7 on Jul 18, 10 at 8:16am
  • It's Jason Statham, and I'm the Transporter, bitches!

    Submitted by Jason_Statham on Jul 18, 10 at 12:22am
  • wow... that's your only concern?! how about sucking someone's dick when you are drunk....HOE!!!!!

    Submitted by od3tt3 on Jul 19, 10 at 12:11am
  • Un first-o-licious

    Submitted by jenny8675309 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:11am
  • Being the first firsty on the post makes me quite firsty

    Submitted by FirstyProtege on Jul 18, 10 at 1:08am
  • Stop trying to put the focus on you lame ass no name idiots. This is firsty's world and folks like you are uninvited. Be gone bastards.

    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 18, 10 at 11:00pm
  • Firsty kicks ass

    Submitted by Me777 on Jul 18, 10 at 12:21am