How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
