Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
i think im in europe. pls send help
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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