Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
