Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
