God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
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