69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
