Banned from zoo.
Again?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
My vagina just recognized that song.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
