I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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