Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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