Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
