OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Randomize
