he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
