Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
it wasn't lemon gatorade
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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