somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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