And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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