i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
